Community

Every day lately I just have to stop. Breathe. And say holy CRRRRAAAPPP.

Is it possible that Andy and I could have the friends we have, with the vision they have, the passion for Christ they have?

This is hard to put into words, and I hate to even admit it, but sometimes I just think, "God, this is too much." Not only have I been redeemed, reconciled, but I am also provided for in abundance. What the heck? WE'RE NOT WORTH, WE'RE NOT WORTHY (Wayne's World reference). Not only am I not worthy, with nothing in and of myself to offer my creator, but I'm a doubter. This is what I doubt:

Acts 2:42-47
"They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved."

We are given this ridiculous picture of community, and our doubt keeps us from pursuing it. Take a look at the oceans, the beaches. Look at any mountain range, The Going to the Sun Road in Glacier. How can we doubt that our God, who created all of these things, could take us and create a community of people "filled with awe...selling their possessions and goods, [giving] to anyone as he had need." Despite our failures. Despite diversity in personality, gifts, interests, backgrounds. The early church didn't doubt it. They walked with Jesus, they knew what He was capable of, what God was capable of doing through them. Why do we doubt it is possible?

I am beginning to believe that the community and vision the early church had is possible today. I am ashamed and sickened that I ever thought otherwise.

Today, this month, this year, I want to pursue this. And every day I am going to get down on my face and thank God for the community He has given me.